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Sex & Health Column

February is the month of self-love, so here’s how you can indulge

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If your Valentine’s Day is short one person, practice a little much needed self-love and destress with a yoga session.

UPDATED: March 6, 2018 at 10:25 p.m.

As college students, we go through a lot of pressure: calendars filled with homework, group projects, school activities and social plans. All of these things make us feel overwhelmed, and sometimes in order to complete these tasks, we adopt unhealthy habits. Whether that means skipping lunch, not exercising or sacrificing sleep, when we’re busy, self-care is the first thing we forget about.

If you spent this Valentine’s Day single, guess what? You didn’t have to worry about planning a cliche dinner or buying gifts for your partner, and that gives you extra time and money to take care of yourself this week instead.

Start to make YOU happy! I declare February the month of self-love!

The most genuine and enduring love should always be self-love. This means not only loving your positive traits, but all of you: your weaknesses, fears, peculiarities, etc. Once you start loving yourself, a whole world of possibilities is at your door — you improve your relationships, your self-esteem and you just feel better. Embrace yourself!



Here’s my take on some ways to be sure you’re treating yourself as you should:

  • Accepting and loving yourself without limitations. Sometimes we put restrictions on our love — we won’t love ourselves until we lose those five pounds, until we acquire the most fashionable clothes, the right partner or whatever. But you can change this by starting to love yourself right now, just as you are.
  • Express yourself and be authentic. Don’t feel like you have to exactly reflect typical gender stereotypes. If you are into other hobbies or passions, embrace that! Everyone is special in their own way.
  • Do any type of exercise. Whether it’s going to the gym, dancing or aerobics, find something you like and get active. You’ll feel better.
  • Try to get involved in social groups, whether it’s a club, a team or another sort of group — getting to know people who share your passion is gratifying.
  • Get some rest and maybe even go to the spa. Treat yourself! Taking care of your body makes you feel good.
  • Don’t stress about things you can’t change.
  • Keep positive thoughts.
  • Get time to watch your favorite movie, order your favorite food, get comfy and Netflix and chill!
  • Make time to help others. As the Dalai Lama said, “If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.”
  • Surround yourself with positive people who respect you and love you.
  • Play your best tunes! Research from the University of Missouri published in The Journal Of Positive Psychology found that upbeat music can have a positive effect on our well-being. Check it out.

mental-illness

Here are some more tips from psychologist Carol Obando:

The D.O.: What are the best ways to practice self-love?

Carol Obando: Self-love is developed by integrating practices that lead to nourish our being, become our own allies and best friends. These practices include from thoughts to actions. For example, waking up and being thankful for everything we are — this helps us focus on our qualities, start the day smiling and valuing each part of us and predisposes us to a good mood.

Facing each day with a good attitude helps us to confront external situations, resolving conflicts assertively without allowing them to influence our emotional state. Training in self-love protects our integrity and happiness.

The D.O.: How can you boost your self-esteem?

C.O.: Working on our personal goals increases self-esteem, since we demonstrate ourselves that we are capable of achieving what we desire, and that same value is evident in external reinforcements that produce us satisfaction. In our brain, wonderful changes occur when we achieve goals. The neurochemicals are in our favor and we manage to overcome stress, and this is how we develop more tools to value ourselves.

CORRECTION: In a previous version of this post, Carol Obando was misnamed. The Daily Orange regrets this error.





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